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Dogged Ma; chapter thirteen, part one

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Chapter Thirteen; Part One

“Where are you?  Are you still with Ted?  Call me.”

“OK, now I know you’re not still with your boy.  Call me!”

I laughed as I erased Ned’s messages, each increasingly agitated.  I had no idea why he took such an interest in my love life when his was infinitely more complicated and fascinating, but I knew I better call him before he busted a gut.  It was ten in the morning Sunday morning, and I had just gotten home.  Ted had skipped church this morning, but he wanted me to go with him at some later date.  I promised I would, and to my surprise, I was looking forward to it.  It would be a change from the Taiwanese church, that was for sure.  Speaking of, Ned should be there right now, but he didn’t go every week; I had a hunch he’d be home this morning just waiting for me to call.  I called him, tapping my foot as I waited for him to answer.

“Girl, what took you so long?  Did you just get home?”  Ned was at full decibel, which meant I had to hold my cell phone away from my ear.  “Oh, no, you didn’t!”  I could practically see him waggling his neck, even across the wires.

“Yes, I did just get home,” I admitted, a smile playing on my lips.  “You wouldn’t believe the drama.”

I wandered into the living room, sinking onto my couch as I did.  I was wearing a t-shirt and sweats borrowed from Ted.  Of course, the latter kept falling off me until Ted had fixed it with a quick basting.  I was impressed Ted had a sewing kit until he reminded me that he was a bachelor.  I liked wearing his clothes, however, and I wasn’t sure I was going to give them back.  I spilled the beans about Ted’s ex, and Ned was appropriately appalled.  He knew Lucinda, of course, and he couldn’t believe she would cause a scene like that.  When I mentioned that she’d been drunk, Ned hadn’t been surprised.  Seemed it ran in her family.  What a shame.

“Now it’s time to dish the dirt,” Ned announced once we were through analyzing Lucinda’s behavior.  “How was he in the sack?”

“I don’t kiss and tell,” I said indignantly.  “Especially not when it’s someone you know.”  I couldn’t resist adding, “I was completely satisfied, though, I’ll tell you that much.  We used a three-pack of condoms, if that tells you anything.”

“You go, girl,” Ned cheered.  He knew how difficult it was for me to find someone who complemented my libido.  That was the most crushing thing about Gary’s betrayal—he had been making excuses not to have sex with me the last six or so months we’d been together, leaving me frustrated more often than not.  While I was wondering what was wrong with him during that time, he was getting it on with one co-ed or another.  “I want details!”  He knew I rarely talked about my sexcapades unless they were one-night stands, so he wasn’t offended when I declined.  “I’m happy for you,” Ned said, his voice subdued for once.  “You deserve someone who treats you right.”

“As do you,” I replied.  Ned had known his fair share of heartache, so I was glad there was someone who put a smile on his face.  “How’s Alonzo?”  I had to listen to exactly how Alonzo was for the next ten minutes because unlike me, Ned did kiss and tell.  By the time he was done, I knew far more about Alonzo than I’d ever wanted to know.

“Oh, I have a great idea!”  Ned said after his recitation.  “I’m inviting you and Ted to my place for dinner very soon.  I’ll invite Alonzo as well, and it’ll be like a double-date!  What do you think?”

“That’ll be fun,” I said enthusiastically.  “Alonzo doesn’t hate women, does he?”  More than once, Ned had introduced me to one of his paramours only to discover that I was most emphatically not welcomed.

“Nope.  Some of his best friends are women.  He told me so himself.”  With that settled, I got off the phone.  I wanted to clean the apartment—something I did once in a blue moon.  Alas, it was not to be.

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Dogged Ma; chapter twelve, part one

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  Chapter Twelve; Part One

“Liz!  What are you doing here?”  It was Friday night, and my sister had shown up unexpectedly.  Again, she got into the building without me buzzing her up.  This was happening more frequently than I liked; I reluctantly decided to call the landlord first thing Monday morning during my prep hour at school to take care of it.

“Are you going to let me in?”  Liz asked waspishly, taking me by surprise.  She was the easygoing one in the family, the sister quick to jump in when others were fighting.  I’d never heard an edge to her voice.  Until tonight.  “I took the bus to see you, so the least you could is let me into your apartment.”

“Come in.”  I stood aside, watching Liz as she entered.  She had cut her waist-length hair so that it fell just slightly past her shoulders in a shag cut.  It looked cute with her pixie face and pointed chin, but my mother must have had a fit when she saw it.  She thought girls under thirty should have long hair.  Liz was taking her time removing her shoes, so I was able to study her more carefully.  Always the thinnest of the sisters, she was almost gaunt now.  She was wearing jeans which hung on her slight hips and a fitted top that was loose as well.  She’d never had big boobs to begin with, but now they were nonexistent.  There were dark circles under her eyes, and she looked exhausted.  I vowed not to get into it with her, even though I knew why she was there.  She dumped her bag by the door, waiting for me to make my overtures.

“Would you like some tea, Liz?  How about some chocolate chip cookies?  They’re your favorite—triple chocolate chunk cookies.  I made them a few nights ago.”  I observed her closely as I made my offer as I was beginning to form a suspicious thought.

“Ew, no,” Liz said, wrinkling her nose.  “Do you know how many calories are in one of your special cookies?  A zillion.”  She straightened up and flashed me a wan grin before hugging me.  It was like hugging a skeleton, and it creeped me out.

“Are you dieting?”  I asked sharply, pulling away from Liz and holding her at an arm’s length.  Her cheeks had hollowed out, and there was a pinched look about her face that hadn’t been there before.

“Just a little,” Liz admitted, not meeting my eyes.  “After Scott dumped me, I felt I needed to get into shape.  You know how it is.”

“You were already in shape,” I pointed out, steering my sister to the living room.  I waited for her to sit before continuing my interrogation.  “What did Scott say to make you feel you needed to lose weight?”  Inside, I was seething.  Scott Jorgenson was a football player with a raging ego.  He was known to blow through the girls like they were nothing.  I had met him once and had been less than impressed.  He and Liz had dated two months before he dumped her.  Since I hadn’t heard her complain, I’d assumed she’d been fine with it.  Big mistake.  Liz didn’t talk about her problems to anyone, which was why she’d struggled with an eating disorder for the last ten years.

“He just said, you know, that I didn’t look as good as I had when we started dating.”  Liz tried to say it casually, but her tone was brittle.  I wanted to hunt down Jorgenson and slice his nuts off.  He was also known to be extremely nasty when he broke up with a girl, probably because of his guilty conscience.  I would bet the fact that Liz wanted to remain a virgin until marriage had more to do with his dumping her than her looks.  “He’s right, you know.  I gained a pound while I was dating him.”  Scott was six-four and almost two-fifty—not all of it muscle.  He was not one to talk about gaining weight, let me tell you.

“Liz, that’s nuts, and you know it.”  I was blunt because nothing else worked with my sister.  Our family had learned through long, hard, painful experience that the only way to even hope to get through her obsession was to be honest to the point of rudeness.  It jolted her out of her trance.  “You look like you should be in a concentration camp.  I bet you’re blacking out again, aren’t you?”  Liz hung her head but didn’t answer.  “Wait right here.”

I left the room before she could respond.  I went into the kitchen and rummaged through my fridge.  Fortunately, I had some leftover noodles and soup from Bona.  Pho, with beef.  My favorite, and one of hers as well.  I heated it in the microwave while pouring a glass of skim milk.  I knew it would be better if Liz had whole, but all I had was skim.  She wouldn’t put up as big a fight if it was skim, anyway.  I grabbed a banana, too.  I put everything on a tray, including utensils.  I grabbed two cookies and placed them on the tray as well.  I’d be lucky if she ate one, but I’d eat the leftover cookie if she didn’t.  Now, I just had to wait for the soup to heat up.  When it was ready, I poured it in a bowl and carried everything back into the living room.  Liz was slumped over on the couch, her eyes closed.  I set the tray on the coffee table and sat next to Liz.

“Liz, wake up.”  I nudged her gently in the ribs, not wanting to bruise her.

“Huh, what?”  Liz opened her eyes, blinking in confusion.  “Where am I?  What happened?”

“You must have blacked out for a minute,” I said, concealing my sadness from her.  I’d been doing this song and dance with her for the last ten years, on and off.  I couldn’t understand how such a beautiful, intelligent girl could be so stupid.  “Here.  Eat this soup.”  I placed the spoon in her hand and closed her fingers over it.  “Now.”  My tone let her know there was no choice but to obey.  She knew I’d force-feed her if I had to, though that was definitely the last resort.  Reluctantly, she spooned a tiny amount of the broth into her mouth and swished it around five times before swallowing.  I knew every bite would take as long if not longer, but I didn’t care.  I’d take all night if I had to.

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Dogged Ma; chapter ten, part one

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Chapter Ten; Part One

“We must first fill the room with incense.”  Wind had been gracious enough to come over that night in answer to my urgent plea.  I knew that I had to seal that damn portal, no matter how much I wanted to remain connected to Lucifer.  “We need to chase the bad spirits out.”  She lit some incense—jasmine, by the smell of it—and handed several sticks to me, keeping several for herself.  She started waving them in the air, indicating that I should follow suit.  I did, but I felt ridiculous doing so.  I didn’t buy into that New-Agey shit, no matter how couched it was in Eastern lingo.  Still, Wind was the expert; I would listen to her until it became too ludicrous for me to do so.

“Close your eyes while I say a quick prayer to the goddess.”  I obeyed, my rational mind thinking it’d be better to pray to God in this case.  I sent Him a brief word as well, figuring it best to hedge my bets.

“Mighty Goddess, listen to my pleas.  Help this woman be strong against the influence of the Dark Prince.  She needs your strength—do not fail her now.”  Wind started humming a tune I didn’t recognize, and I kept my eyes closed.  I was starting to feel stupid when Wind instructed me to bow deeply before opening my eyes.  I had a hunch God was roaring with laughter at our feeble antics, but I kept that opinion to myself.

“Now, sit on the floor cross-legged while I set a few things in place.”  Wind’s tone was bossy as she rummaged through her bag.  As she was doing me a favor, I tried not to take offense.  I watched as she took out a heap of sage and placed a bundle in each corner of the living room.  She seemed to think my living room contained the actual portal though I first saw the Morningstar in my bathroom.  She said she’d fortify each room later, but the living room was the focus of her attention.

After she lit the sage on fire, she popped a CD in my player and pressed play.  Some flute music wafted out of my speakers, grating on my nerves.  How could I take this seriously when everything about it screamed hokey?  I tried to clear my mind of negative thoughts, but it was difficult.  I watched in disbelief as Wind started hopping and jumping around the room.  I assumed she was trying to mimic an Indian dance, but the jerkiness of her movements made it hard to discern.  She hummed under her breath to the tune on the CD player, totally involved in what she was doing.  She lifted her hands upwards, beseeching the Goddess to hear our cries.  As she was the only one crying out, I thought she was stretching the truth a bit.

“God,” I muttered softly.  What the fuck had I gotten myself into?  Was I just making things worse with this idiotic behavior on the part of Wind?  Who the fuck knew?

“Margaret, come here.”  Wind’s voice snapped me out of my funk.  I rose and crossed over to her.  She made a new bundle of sage and lit it before waving it over my head.  I sneezed several times, but Wind kept waving.  Just when I was going to grab the shit out of her hand and throw it as far as possible, she stopped.  “Hold this.”  She gave me the bundle before rummaging through her bag again.  This time, she pulled out a box of white chalk and drew out a stick.

“Hey, what the fuck are you doing with that?”  I asked in alarm as she started for one of my maroon-colored walls.

“I have to mark your walls,” Wind explained, drawing a symbol on one of my walls.

“You can’t do that!”  I exclaimed, grabbing her drawing arm.  “Stop!”

“I have to,” Wind retorted, jerking away from me.  I stood back helplessly as she continued to mark my walls with esoteric symbols.  Thank God it was only chalk which could be easily wiped off.  Or so I hoped.

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Dogged Ma; chapter nine, part three

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Chapter Nine; Part Three

“Delivery for Margaret Wang.”

“I’ll be right there.”  Another one?  Who could it be this time?  I went downstairs and peeked outside, seeing a delivery guy with a bouquet of fiery orange and red roses.  The colors of the roses were so pure, they almost hurt my eyes.

“Here you go,” the delivery guy said, thrusting the enormous bouquet into my waiting arms.  I rushed upstairs, eager to find out who’d sent me such a beautiful arrangement.  I hunted for the card before finally finding it.  In beautiful penmanship, someone had inscribed, ‘Margaret Marilyn, you are mine.  Morningstar.’  They were from Lucifer!  I should throw them away.  They were, without a doubt, the most breathtaking roses I’d ever seen, and I didn’t even care for roses.  I walked slowly into the kitchen trying to decide what to do.  In the end, I rationalized that it couldn’t hurt to keep them.  They would die in a few days, anyway, wouldn’t they?  Suddenly, I wasn’t sure they were real flowers.  I mean, Lucifer could have had them specially made if he wanted.  I arranged them, anyway, and brought them into the living room where I set the vase besides the orchids from Alan.  The two bouquets looked great side-by-side; I could get used to being treated like a queen.  Too bad neither bunch was from the guy I was actually trying to date.

I needed to do something about Lucifer.  He was stepping up his campaign, and I wasn’t sure how long I’d be able to hold out against him.  I called Wind who answered on the third ring.  Seems I had disturbed her during her meditation time for which I profusely apologized.  When I explained what I wanted, however, she agreed to come over and see what she could do.  She didn’t sound as confident as I would have liked given that Li Ling had practically promised that Wind could take care of the problem, but I let it go.  I thought about calling my mother again, but I resisted.  She had to make the first overture.  I flicked on the television to watch something until Wind came.  It was a welcome respite from thinking.  I was so engrossed in the Iron Chefs that the buzzer startled me when it sounded forty-five minutes later.

“Wind?”  I asked before buzzing her up.  I hugged her gratefully after she breezed into my apartment.  She was in a simple gauzy skirt and t-shirt, no accessories or makeup.

“Time for the big guns, I guess,” Wind said briskly, lugging her over-sized bag inside.  She stopped as she noticed the flowers on my coffee table.  “Please tell me those are from Ted because you had a really great date.”

“We did have a great date,” I said, motioning her in.  “However, the orchids are from Alan and the roses are from….”  I hesitated because I knew how she felt about me consorting with the devil.  “Lucifer.”

“The devil?  He sent you flowers?”  Wind shrieked, causing me to wince.  I had sensitive ears, and she had a booming voice when she so chose.  “You have to get rid of them.”  Before I could stop her, she grabbed the flowers, strode over to the window and flung them out.

“Hey!  What did you do that for?”  I protested, rushing over to the window.  There were my beautiful roses, lying on the ground.  Before anybody could step on them, however, they slowly started rising in the air until they were right outside my window.  The funny thing was that nobody paid the slightest attention to the floating flowers.

“Don’t touch those,” Wind shouted, struggling to get me away from the window.  “What good will it do for me to seal the portal if you allow those roses in your apartment?”  I must have looked confused because she expanded.  “As long as you keep something of the devil’s in your apartment, he will always be afforded access.  You must cleanse your apartment from his presence, down to the last flower.”  She was so engrossed in her lecturing, she didn’t notice the roses tossing themselves through my window and back into their vase.  When she saw them sitting as pretty as you please on the coffee table, she made a sound of disgust in the back of her throat.  “It appears that you have to throw them out if we want to be rid of them for good.”  But did I?

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Dogged Ma; chapter eight

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Chapter Eight

“Margaret!  Let us in!”  It was Thursday night, and someone was banging at my door.  Shit.  It was Wind and Ned.  Again, somebody had let them in.  I had half a mind to talk to the landlord about the lax security, but it didn’t seem worth the effort.

“Wind, Ned, how nice of you to drop by.”  I pasted a smile on my face as I opened my door.  “Ever hear of phoning first?”

“I’m here to cleanse your apartment,” Wind announced, pushing me aside.  She was wearing a flowing skirt decorated with tarot card figures and a red peasant blouse.  She had a scarf wound around her head, and she was at her most fey.  Ned was trailing her, rolling his eyes at her back.  I would have laughed if I weren’t completely befuddled as to what Wind was saying.  “Ned and I talked it over and decided that it was the devil who’s been talking to you—not God.  That’s why I need to do a cleansing ceremony.”  She opened her bag and dumped the contents of it onto the coffee table in my living room.

“Wind, it wasn’t the devil,” I interposed, eyeing the items with curiosity.  She had sage, tarot cards, a bottle of a clear liquid, and a few other things I couldn’t identify.  “I’ve met Lucifer, so I know it wasn’t him.”  The minute I said that, I wished I hadn’t.  For some reason, I wanted to keep Lucifer to myself.  Me and my big mouth.

“You met the devil?  What’s he like?”  Ned asked, his eyes wide.  “Is he just too gruesome for words?”

“Actually, he’s the best-looking man I’ve ever met,” I said, keeping my voice casual.  I couldn’t fool my two best friends, however, and they exchanged looks of horror.  “After Alan, of course.”  I tried to switch tacks, but they were having none of that.

“You have a crush on the devil?”  Wind asked, clutching her sage to her bosom.

“I didn’t say that,” I protested, feeling a twinge of conscience.  If I were to be absolutely honest, I did have a little crush on the Morningstar.  “I was talking strictly about his physical pulchritude, which is magnificent.”

“What did he want?”  Ned asked, eyeing me with curiosity.  “I mean, Lucifer just doesn’t show up to say hi, does he?”

We all sat down in the living room as I unfolded my tale about meeting Lucifer.  They couldn’t believe I hadn’t told them right away, but they forgave me when I said that I needed time to digest meeting the devil.  What I didn’t tell them was how Lucifer had almost seduced me into revealing what God wanted with me.  I also didn’t divulge God’s warning about what might happen if I took Lucifer up on his offer.  I knew I should have told them everything, but I wanted to keep something to myself.  My entire life had been ripped apart the last few weeks, and I wanted to maintain a vestige of privacy.  At least, that’s what I told myself.

“God, the devil, the Angel of Death, and a protection angel,” Ned mused, looking shell-shocked.  “You’ve had quite the experience, haven’t you?”  He looked as if he was wondering whom I’d meet next.  I did, too, what with the way celestial beings were using my apartment as Grand Central Station.

“I have a date with Ted tomorrow night as well,” I said brightly, trying to change the tenor of the conversation.

“That’s right,” Ned said, brightening as well.  “Wouldn’t it be funny if he turned out to be an alien or something as well?”  The look I shot him said it most definitely would not be funny, thank you very much.

“Who’s Ted?”  Wind asked, looking from Ned to me and back.  That reminded us that we hadn’t told her about the drama on Saturday, so we were off and running.  We told her everything in excruciating detail, and I had Ned howling with my recitation of misdeeds I had committed at said party.  When we reached the part of Ned grappling with his father, well, we all lost it.  It had been terrifying at the time, but it was hysterical in retrospect.  How white trash can you get, wrestling with your father in his living room?  While you’re both wearing tuxes?  It tickled our funny bone to no end.

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